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BONUS: The Garden of God’s Retirement

So, turns out our horny —sorry, “horned” — romantic Pluto has siblings. And like all siblings, they’re annoying, disruptive, omniscientish, and likely to go darting off through space at something approaching light speed just to show off in front of YOUR girlfriend. Ok, those last two might apply more to Pluto’s sibs than yours. Whatever the case, they hog all the ambrosia, snap your privates with a lightning bolt when you least expect it … yeah, I hear it, that might be more Pluto’s sibs than yours too, but you get my point — annoying.

And like all siblings, they expect all the plebes to worship the very ground they walk on. Even if that ground was the plebes’ to start with.

In this fabulous bonus episode penned by our own Pete Barry (we love that guy, even if we want to drown Bob in his own earwax), Pluto of the honey-covered voice and words returns to sweep Donna off on the kind of impromptu vacay that requires super powers and membership in the Valhalla of Fame.

But their romantic sojourn is interrupted by Pluto’s siblings, and things, rather like this description, unravel from there.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

  • Lee Shackleford as Pluto
  • Bonnie Brantley as Donna
  • Chris Klaniecki as Mercury
  • Rebecca Serfass as Diana
  • Dave Stanger as Mars
  • J. Michael DeAngelis as Neptune
  • Dave Serfass as Vulcan
  • Pete Barry as Jupiter
  • Chris Nadolny Gourley is your Narrator.

FX provided by Pete Barry and Freesound users, including:

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BONUS: Interviews with your ever-lovin’ Crew – Aaron (heeeeee’s baaaaaaaaack)

t’s frankly annoying how much y’all have missed this guy (and yes, we get it, we missed him too). “When’s LBF coming back?” We heard you cry. “Bring back the Frounch dude!”

FINE.

The silly meter just shot from 11 to infinity and you’ve no one to blame but yourselves.

And of course, we’re offering our standard apology to France and all French-speaking peoples and areas of the world for our continued and downright gleeful butchering of your glorious language and its many accents. All of which appear to be rolled into this one guy.

Seriously, I just watched a parrot on TikTok who NAILED IT. But we’ve got … LBF.

Listen up, Space Monkeys, as Sarah Golding tries to glue the utterly delightful Aaron Clark to a chair and chat with the notorious Frounch fellow, the man who puts the double ass in assassin. Oh, and there’s Ben. Remember Ben? Yeah, we didn’t either, but now we’re pretty sure he has something to do with Julie.

Welcome back, le Bichon Frise!

Pretty sure that’s pronounced free-

 

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BONUS: Interviews with yer ever-lovin’ Crew – Pete (we love that guy)

First, if you haven’t listened to Mission: Rejected, seriously, do you read these notes EVER? We’ve mentioned that show a brazillion times, so just GO LISTEN ALREADY. Look, I’ll even make it easy for you: here is their website (https://www.missionrejected.com/). Here it is on Apple podcasts (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mission-rejected/id1454748884) and on Spotify (https://open.spotify.com/show/5uhNkMlYaJmIg1GZU5LCl2?si=f62f29bb30cf4df3).

There! Anything else I can do for you? Make you a sandwich, perhaps? Dust off your dainty toesies? Sheesh.

Second, this is Sarah Golding and Pete Barry being all sorts of witty and fun. Enjoy.

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BONUS: Interviews with yer ever-lovin’ Crew: Kevin

Hmmmmmm? Wazzat? Oh, hello, are you still here? Goodness, you are patient. Yes, season 7 is still in the works. Here’s a little something to tide you over until it splooches messily into your timeline.

This is one of those silly conversations between the glorious Sarah Golding and poor Kevin Hall (Greg, Felonius), who has died on Oz 9 more than anyone else, although not recently which may mean he’s overdue.

Ignorance Was Bliss podcast by Kate Wallinga who mattered and is most desperately missed: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ignorance-was-bliss/id1341566170

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BONUS: Interviews with yer ever-lovin’ Crew: Tim and Chrisi

More 9ers because let’s face it: little in life is as satisfying as someone else’s world spiraling utterly out of control as they get deeper and deeper into a festering bog-swamp of bad decisions and regret.

Tim has an excuse — it was hard to see at the beginning how truly ridiculous this train wreck was going to be. Chrisi joined up after it was abundantly clear that was a bad idea. We can only attribute it to pie-eyed optimism.

Anyway, listen up as Tim Sherburn (Colin and Emily) and Chrisi Talyn Saje (Julie) attempt to explain to Sarah Golding (Mrs Sheffield, just not right now) how they got entangled in all this nonsense.

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BONUS: Interviews with yer ever-lovin’ Crew: Eric and Shannon

Who doesn’t want to spend more time being utterly confused by the Idiots of Oz 9?

Don’t answer that. PUT YOUR HAND DOWN.

Sarah Golding, who has zero time left in her busy days, couldn’t resist adding one more spicy meatball to her heaping plate and decided to interview the cast and characters of Oz 9, in no particular order.

First up: the Perry siblings — Eric Perry, plus his alter egos of Joe (JESUS!), Dr von Haber Zetzer, Mr Southers, and Howard. Then Shannon Perry —accompanied as ever by the cough-syrup-induced twin hallucinations of Olivia and Captain Madeline.

Enjoy. Ish.

NOTE: Interested in the game Shannon mentioned? Get more information here: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/169549125/xorakus.

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BONUS: Interviews with yer ever-lovin’ Crew: David and Bonnie

Well, I’d say the fun never ends with this crew, but in truth, empires have risen, fallen, risen again, fallen again, and risen a third time to cries of “good god, will you just stay dead” and we’re all still waiting for the fun to START. But these two are modestly entertaining, if you’re feeling relaxed, have some good wine, and have recently been on the sharpish end of an icepick to the brain.

Just… listen. What else are you going to do? It’s not like you have pressing business to attend to, now is it?

It’s Sarah Golding, chatting with David S. Dear (and Dr. Theo Bromae ((*swoon*)) and Tiberius) and Bonnie Brantley (and FORMER Captain Jessie, Donna, and Lady Nibblebiscuit.

 

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episode 120: That volcano outside Hveragerði

We assume our title will send tens of you dashing to Google Translate or similar to check Joe’s [Jesus!] pronunciation, so spoiler alert, he’s spot on. Or not. Apologies to Icelanders.

So…. 120’s out. That’s a thing we finally did. With it, season six concludes and begins its long trudge toward inevitable oblivion. But with goats, so it’s not so bad.

Stay tuned for a special announcement at the end, and no, I’m not going to tell you here or even give you a hint. LISTEN TO THE SHOW. That’s why we made it. Sheesh!

I will give you one spoiler, though: the volcano is a red herring. For now.

 

TRANSCRIPT (this one looks funny, so shout at me on Bluesky or Discord if it’s not working, k?)

You’ve been listening to:

Eric Perry as Joe, Howard, Dr. von Haber Zetzer, and Mr Southers.
Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Chrisi Talyn Saje as Julie
All the Space Monkeys in our Discord for providing the yodeling goats
David S Dear as Dr Theo Bromae and Tiberius
Kevin Hall as Greg and Felonius
Pete Barry as Bob and Me
Sarah Rhea Warner as Pipistrelle
Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline
Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily
June Clark Eubanks as herself
Aaron Clark as himself
Lee Shackleford as himself
Richard Cowen as himself
Kyle Jones is your Narrator Two
And Chris Nadolny Gourley is your Narrator

John Faley is our music director, and our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Sarah Golding is our dialogue editor, and Mark Restuccia is our sound designer. Oz 9 is written by Shannon Perry.

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable and Folly Network. Please check out our sibling shows at fableandfolly.com and support our sponsors.

Until… I dunno, late springish? Early summerish? Keep your eyes on the stars, and it’s pronounced phal-OM-eter.

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episode 119: Chain-smoking nut-bag bum-pouch

NOTE: follow us on Bluesky (@oz9podcast.bsky.social) or join our Discord channel (https://discord.gg/4zXBRxH) for updates on our End of Season Six Live Listen!


Right, don’t tell your parents we suggested this, but we kinda think the title of this episode would make a hell of a Halloween costume….

Ahem.

The away ship is basically nestled in the Oz 9’s armpit, the ship’s assassin is expiring faster than yesterday’s dairy-based leftovers on the back seat of a hot car, the crew have to figure out how to hijack their own ship without weapons, strategy, or sufficient intellect to stay out of a silk tunnel when wearing pointy shoes, and it’s TUESDAY.

Also, that’s the last time I let Cpt. Jessie write the show notes.

Just listen. You’ll figure it out.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Bonnie Brantley as Jessie, Donna, and Lady Nibble-Biscuit
Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia.
Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily
Pete Barry as Bob and the Bartender
David S Dear as Dr Theo Bromae and Tiberius
Eric Perry as Joe, Dr. von Haber Zetzer, Mr Southers, and Howard
Kevin Hall as Greg and Felonius
Chrisi Talyn Saje as Julie
Michaela Gourley as the little girl
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield and
Mark Restuccia as C4 from Best in Galaxy
Kyle Jones is your Narrator Two
And Chris Nadolny Gourley is your Narrator

John Faley is our music director, and our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Sarah Golding is our dialogue editor, and Mark Restuccia is our sound designer. Oz 9 is written by Shannon Perry.

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable and Folly Network. Please check out our sibling shows at fableandfolly.com and support our sponsors.

Until next time, Space Monkeys, maybe stock up on some extra gravity. You know, just in case….

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