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Bonus episode: Mission: *FWIP*!

A rift in time and space causes four members of the Oz 9 crew to get pulled off the space ship (bringing the median IQ up a significant number of notches) and swapped with four members of the EMF (aaaaaaaaaaand we’re back to where we were, IQ-wise).

This is part two of a special two-part crossover with the frankly hilarious secret agent comedy, Mission: Rejected. If you haven’t heard part one yet, stop, put us on pause, go out, listen to part 1 on the Mission: Rejected feed, come back, take us off pause, because from this moment forward….

I’d say “spoilers,” but let’s face it… it’s mostly nonsense. 

Be sure to listen to the fantastic comedy being dished up at Mission: Rejected (https://missionrejected.simplecast.com/). You won’t regret it. Much.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to: (In alphabetical order)

Ashley Banks as Athena O’Brien
Pete Barry as Kristatos O’Brien
Bonnie Brantley as Jessie
Aaron Clark as Le Bichon Frise
Richard Cowen as Leet
J. Michael DeAngelis as Larry Hastings
David S. Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae
Faith Dowgin as Section Chief Zelda Anders
John Dowgin as Dr. Biff Studebaker
June Clark Eubanks as The Albatros
Sarah Golding as Mrs. Sheffield
Kevin Hall as Greg
Jill Ivey as the Western Union Woman
Bob Killion as The Admiral and Orin
Chris Klaniecki as Skip Granger
Paige Klaniecki as Gloria Kovak
Eric Perry as Doctor von Haber Zetzer and Joe
Shannon Perry as Olivia, Madeline, and Dr. Pickle
Dave Sanger as Bowden Montcrief
Nazli Sarpkaya as Mackenzie McGrath
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Kirk White as Chet Phillips
Karen Yang as Dr. Karol Legrange
with Richard Nadolny as your Narrator
and Kevin McGrath as The Mission Voice

Our music was by Pete Barry and John Faley. This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks and J. Michael DeAngelis. (Do all podcast directors have three names?)

This episode was written by Shannon Perry, Pete Barry, J. Michael DeAngelis and John Dowgin. Sound mixing and editing was by Pete Barry. Mission Rejected is written and produced by Pete Barry, J. Michael DeAngelis, and John Dowgin. Oz-9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry.

Sound effect attributions below. All other sound effects by Pete Barry (https://freesound.org/people/PeteBarry/) and Shannon Perry. 

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episode fifty-five: Monkey Man, gather the sweets

OK, OK, yes, it’s late AGAIN. We know. We’ve been having a really rough time lately, the kids are sick, the roof caved in when we had that thunderstorm last week, and then there was that other thing….

No, you’re right. None of that is true. Our alarm is a bored dude just saying “alarm alarm alarm” over and over, so clearly this is not a well-financed, slick-and-professional thing we’ve got going here. 

Throw some money at our Patreon or Kofi, and maybe we can talk about maintaining a schedule. It won’t happen, but we can talk.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to…
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Lee Shackleford as Pluto
Iri Alexander as Julie
Aaron Clark as Ben
Bonnie Brantley as Donna
Richard Cowen as Tiberius
Kevin Hall as Felonius
Eric Perry as Mr. Southers,
and Richard Nadolny as your Narrator.

Our music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry.

Our next episode is extra special, and we’re super excited to bring it to you. Plus, someone else is doing the production, so it’ll probably be on time!

Until then, Space Monkeys!

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episode fifty-four: Remove the bejesus with fear

All the backstory you never wanted and then some. We find out some stuff about Le Bichon Frise, some other stuff about Donna, blah blah blah. Greg falls over at one point, so that’s pretty funny. 

I’d say “sorry it’s so late,” but I feel like I ought to be it before I say it. So…. It’s late. 

TRANSCRIPT

(You may have to download the transcript in order to see all the pages)

You’ve been listening to:

Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie
Eric Perry as Dr. von Haber Zetzer & Joe
Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline
Aaron Clark as Le Bichon Frise
David S. Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae
Kevin Hall as Greg
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Richard Cowen as Leet
introducing Janis Westin as The Greyhound
Richard Nadolny is our Narrator

Our music is composed and performed by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry.

Don’t forget to check out our Fan Kit, available to download for free from our website, https://oz-9/com

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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episode fifty-three: Where’s Grammar Girl when you need her?

The universe may be crashing around your ears, but as long as you know the difference between who and whom and how to scoop up a dangling participle, you’ll be all right. It’s kind of like knowing where your towel is.

In this very special episode, a guest pops onto the ship and into Leet’s arms, and for a few moments at least, all seems right with the world.

A very few moments. And not really “right” so much as “slightly less wrong.”

Many thanks to our very special guest, Mignon Fogarty, educator, author, speaker, and host of the brilliant, award-winning Grammar Girl’s Quick and Dirty Tips to Better Writing podcast!

 

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Lee Shackleford as Pluto
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Bonnie Brantley as Donna
Iri Alexander as Julie
Aaron Clark as Ben and le Bichon Frise
Eric Perry as Mr Southers and Dr. von Haber Zetzer
Mignon Fogarty as the Mime
Kevin Hall as Felonius and Greg
David S. Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Richard Cowen as Leet
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia
and Richard Nadolny as your Narrator.

Our music is composed and performed by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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episode fifty-two: Everyone knows about böckling

Do you know how to disable an invisible alarm? Yeah, well, listen close; someone on our crew is about to tell you.

Well, maybe… we’re not entirely sure it works, so I don’t know that I’d test it at the Louvre. Maybe Paddy MacDougal’s Museum O’Naughty Limericks and Saucy Sea Shanties first.

Just steer clear of the green milkshakes. Actually, that’s a really good lesson for the Oz 9 as well.

Anyway, here’s the episode, it’s late, and there are probably half a dozen limericks at Paddy’s that could push it down and steal its lunch money, but never mind. Someone bring me some wine, and don’t spare the chickens.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

David S. Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae
Richard Cowen as Leet
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Eric Perry as Southers and Dr. von Haber Zetzer
Iri Alexander as Julie
Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie
Kevin Hall as Felonius and Greg
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Aaron Clark as Le Bichon Frise and Ben
Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline, and
Richard Nadolny as your Narrator

Our music is composed and performed by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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episode fifty-one: I look damn good in jodhpurs

The crew aboard the Oz 9 are stalactites, holding tight to the ceiling in unexpected zero Gs, and the crew on the ground are stalagmites, who might survive if a crabby, oddly dressed ancient god decides to let them go.

You know, same old same old.

Oz 9 is back from holiday break, though why a crew that typically works a solid seven-minute day needs a break is yet to be determined.

We hope you missed us as much as we very nearly missed that very important satellite. Hey, who needs news in this day and age, amirite?

Thanks to the awesome Ann Sloan for providing the trailer for her very funny Carlotta Beautox Chronicles podcast!

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Tim Sherburn as Colin and Buck
Eric Perry as Dr. von Haber Zetzer, Joe, and Mr Southers
Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros and Glenda
David S Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae
Aaron Clark as Le Bichon Frise and Ben
Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline
Kevin Hall as Greg and Felonius
Richard Cowen as Leet
Iri Alexander as Julie
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Lee Shackleford as Pluto, and
Richard Nadolny as the Narrator

Our music was composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

 

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It doesn’t get much more trivial than this

To punish Kevin Hall for having the gall to … something, I can’t remember what it was he did, but for sure he did something really bad to merit this kind of response…. Anyway, maybe just to be mean, we made him relisten to Oz 9, write a bunch of trivia questions, then ask them to four people who between them could barely scrape up an answer to the question of what they had for breakfast on that particular day.

It’s nearly 90 minutes of “uhhhhhh…..” and “hang on, I know I know this one,” and “seriously, Kevin, where are you getting these questions?!” and very few answers, but if you like that sort of thing, it’s good for an occasional laugh.

Seriously, thanks to Kevin for enduring, and for Bryan, Corey, and Jess for being amazing, fantastic sports.

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Diary of a Oz9ivist: Is this a cheese dream?

What happens when the alien aboard your ship gets hungry?

Usually really gross things involving lots of blood and gore and that, but fortunately for us, the grossest thing in this episode is a small critter popping out of an orifice. Which is actually less gross than it sounds. Wait for it.

The ships of Samantha Lyons and the Oz 9 have stumbled into one another in space, and Leet’s had lots of caffeine, and there’s some dancing.

Our thanks to the glorious Beccy Stirrup, creator, writer, and actor on Diary of a Space Archivist for creating this with us!

Please note that Oz 9 will be taking a brief holiday hiatus and we’ll be back in January of 2021. Happy hols to alls!

TRANSCRIPT

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episode fifty: M’Lady of Little Chadwick upon Bad Patter

Humans on the receiving end of divine affections don’t do so well, mythologically speaking. However, after having seen Donna in action, the smart money is on the homo sapien. Pluto better watch his gold lamé onesie, if he knows what’s good for him.

With this episode, we are officially halfway through Season 3 of Oz 9, so let’s all take a moment to realize this crew of idiots has managed to survive this long. Well, apart from Matt, that guard in the tunnel, Lady Nibble-Biscuit, the mime, several thousand pod-occupants, 1/3 of Sweden…. never mind.

As this gaggle of ninnies is still out there, do please be careful. Wear your mask, wash your hands, carry Idiot Repellant, and join us for WiFiSciFi on December 6!


FULL TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Eric Perry as Dr. von Haber Zetzer, Joe, and Howard
Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
David S. Dear as Dr. Theo
Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise and Ben
Kevin Hall as Greg and Tiberius
Richard Cowen as Leet
Iri Alexander as Julie
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Lee Shackleford as Pluto
and Richard Nadolny as your narrator

Our music was composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. Our thanks to Just Short of Crazy blog for the image of Pluto.

Our gratitude to the very real town of French Lick, Indiana, for not issuing and cease and desist orders or otherwise objecting to us invading their home. If you are a resident of or have been to French Lick, we’d love to hear from you. Give us a shout at crew@oz-9.com.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

 

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