Category: episodes

episode 76: Covered in goat dung and yodelers

episode 76: Covered in goat dung and yodelers

Published August 14, 2022

It’s entirely possible this story has spun a wee bit out of control. But then, isn’t that a lot like…life?

I mean, take your basic ergonomic keyboard. Don’t you want to bash its tiny electronic brains out on a rock, only it was expensive and nominally doing something useful for your hands or wrists or something? While that might be an overreaction, might it also be considered an entirely understandable response to the fact that every time you try to type an exclamation point you get that weird squiggly tilde or whatever that thing is called, and let’s face it, for some of us, there’s just not that much call for a tilde, as I don’t speak a language that requires it, nor do I need to indicate “approximately” that often-

Sorry.

Just … listen to the thing. Or not. Whatever~ oh for fu-

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna
Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia
June Clark Eubanks as Teresa and the Albatros
Eric Perry as Joe and Dr von Haber Zetzer
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Richard Cowen as Leet
David S Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae
Kevin Hall as Greg
Aaron Clark as Ben and Le Bichon Frise
Chrisi Talyn Saje as Julie
Lee Shackleford as Pluto
Richard Nadolny as The Alarm
Kyle Jones as Narrator 2 and
Chris Nadolny Gourley as your Narrator

Our music is by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Our dialogue is edited by Sarah Golding, and Oliver Morris is our sound designer. Oz 9 is written by Shannon Perry.

Until next time, Space Monkeys~

SERIOUSLY????

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episode 75: Mad stories of trampled relatives

episode 75: Mad stories of trampled relatives

Published July 31, 2022

Note: This is the final episode narrated by Richard Nadolny. His fabulous daughter Chris Nadolny Gourley takes over the mic in 76.

Other note: despite what the credits say, this episode was edited by Sarah Golding and sound designed by Oliver Morris. (Both geniuses; give them lots of gigs and money.)

We’d say the pace is picking up, but seriously, when you’re just going around in circles because half of your engines are blown out, does pace really matter?

Also, did YOU know National Geographic has a Narrators’ Lounge? Who do you suppose hangs out in there? Freeman and Attenborough, obv; surely Ron Howard drops by now and again, Benedict Cumberbatch probably quit coming by after that whole “peng-wing” incident… Oprah has her own wing…

Sorry, got a little distracted there. What were we talking about? Oh hell, I’m sure whatever it was, it wasn’t very important.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline
Richard Cowen as Leet
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Kevin Hall as Greg and Felonius
Eric Perry as Dr von Haber Zetzer and Southers
David S Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae
Chrisi Talyn Saje as Julie
Aaron Clark as Ben and le Bichon Frise
Bonnie Brantley as Jessie
Kyle Jones as Narrator 2 and
Richard Nadolny as your Narrator

Our music is by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Oz 9 is written by Shannon Perry. As previously mentioned, production was by the Dream Team of Sarah Golding and Oliver Morris.

Until next time, Space Monkeys, try not to bump into the moon.

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episode 74: You know where the porn stash is

episode 74: You know where the porn stash is

Published July 17, 2022

It’s episode 74, and you know what that means…. DO you know what it means? Could you write it on a note and slip it to us during study hall, because we’ve got nothing.

Things are just Nutty McNutface with this crew, and everyone’s in the dark, literally and figuratively. Who can you trust when everyone’s skulky and half the crew went to spy school but apparently no one actually read O Captain You’re a Captain?

Our favorite cabbage-heads are once again struggling to survive, and the smart money is on the plants.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Chrisi Talyn Saje as Julie
Aaron Clark as Ben and le Bichon Frise
David S Dear as Tiberius and Dr. Theo Bromae
Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline
Richard Cowen as Leet
Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily
Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna
Kevin Hall as Greg
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Eric Perry as Dr von Haber Zetzer, Joe, and Howard
Kyle Jones is Narrator 2 and
Richard Nadolny is your Narrator

Our music is by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Oz 9 is written by Shannon Perry. This episode is edited by Sarah Golding; our Sound Designer is Oliver Morris.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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episode 73: Is that a Giant Turnip?

episode 73: Is that a Giant Turnip?

Published June 30, 2022

Warning: this is narrated by Richard, so take care of you.

Brugmansia, it turns out, isn’t a type of Italian leather shoe. Nor is it the third movement of something by Beethoven. And it is definitely NOT edible.

But it can be stuck in one’s mouth and swallowed, so of course, the bumfluff crew of Oz 9 did.

BTW, St. Leonard’s Day isn’t a real thing. But it should be.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to…

Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna
Richard Cowen as Leet
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Aaron Clark as Ben and le Bichon Frise
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Kevin Hall as Greg
Shannon Perry as Madeline
Iri Alexander as Julie
Eric Perry as Dr von Haber Zetzer, Mr Southers, and Joe
David S Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae
Lee Shackleford as Pluto
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Kyle Jones is Narrator 2, and
Richard Nadolny is your Narrator

Our music is by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Oz 9 is written by Shannon Perry and edited and produced by Oliver Morris.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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episode 72: Cahooty

episode 72: Cahooty

Published June 11, 2022

Content warning: Richard narrates this episode, so take care of you.

To start, massive cahooty thanks to Oliver Morris of Kane and Feels: Daytrippers without whom this episode might never have gotten edited and out. And do stay tuned for a taste of Kane and Feels at the end of the episode — it’s delicious!

It’s episode 72, and our squad of scrambled eggs are trying desperately to figure out who they can trust and who they can’t, and the Gordion knot of it all will probably never be untangled, not that any of this crew have any notion what a Gordion knot is when it’s at home.

Good luck to us all.

See you ’round the bend, Space Monkeys.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Eric Perry as Joe and Howard
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
David S Dear as Tiberius
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Aaron Clark as Ben
Richard Cowen as Leet
Kevin Hall as Greg and Felonius
Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily
Bonnie Brantley as Jessie
Lee Shackleford as Pluto
Shannon Perry as Madeline
Kyle Jones as Narrator 2, and
Richard Nadolny as your Narrator

Our music is by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. Support us on Patreon, if you’ve nothing better to do…

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episode 71: Rumblings in the astral region

episode 71: Rumblings in the astral region

Published April 10, 2022

If you’ve never had chocolate milkweed with rosemallows, you’re really missing out.

On stomach upset, whiplash-inducing vomiting, an itchy rash, and unconsciousness, which is really the best part.

Despite the litany of side effects, Leet is dishing up a mug just for you, so please join us aboard the Oz 9, as we head out for another entirely pointless journey.

Be sure to stay till the end to hear a trailer of a much more sensible and quite fabulous science fiction audio drama: Chaika.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Kevin Hall as Greg
Eric Perry as Howard
David S Dear as Dr Theo Bromae
Lee Shackleford as Pluto
Tim Sherburn as Emily and Colin
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia
Richard Cowen as Leet
Kyle Jones as Narrator 2 and
Richard Nadolny as your Narrator.

Our music is by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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episode 70: Do we have any more tuber tots?

Published March 20, 2022

Oh, hell, now we’re getting all Lord of the Ringsy with sacred tokens and some sort of binding agent to herd them all or whatever, blah blah blah.

We’re back on board the Oz 9, and the crew is far more interested in their next cocktail than in, I dunno, SAVING EARTH OR WHATEVER. Although, I could murder a cosmo….

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to….

Eric Perry as Dr von Haber Zetzer
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
David S Dear as Dr Theo Bromae
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Aaron Clark as Le Bichon Frise
Richard Cowen as Leet
Kevin Hall as Greg
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna
Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia
and Kyle Jones as Narrator 2, with
Richard Nadolny as your Narrator

Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott, our music is by John Faley, and Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry.

Just a reminder that you can still purchase our merchandise or support us on Patreon by going to our website, Oz-9.com, following the links.

That’s it for us, Space Monkeys; we’ll see you next time!

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episode sixty-nine: Tighter than a Minnesotan manhole

Published March 4, 2022

It’s episode 69, and the whole world is just upside down.

Oh, come on, not even ONE “sixty-nine” joke? Sheesh.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to…
Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield
Lee Shackleford as Pluto
Aaron Clark as Ben
Iri Alexander as Julie
Eric Perry as Mr Southers
Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna
Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia
June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros
Richard Cowen as Leet
Tim Sherburn as Colin
Richard Nadolny as your Narrator, and
Kyle Jones as Narrator 2.

Our music is by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. Our comic books are on sale on Etsy, and all of the cool kids are buying them.

Until next time, space monkeys!

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episode sixty-eight: Hold our swamp hooch

Published January 25, 2022

This episode is dedicated to the memory of Granny Shelp,
who held the codes to Gated Galaxies, and the key to our hearts.
Much love to one of our forever space monkeys.

Leet’s been boiling up … well, we’re not sure what those are. He thought they were apples, and he was trying to make apple cider. Or maybe apple sauce, we’re not really clear what he was aiming for. In any event, he ended up with something that can only be contained in these special jars the Albatros makes from clay from the bioswamp; it burns right through everything else.

Anyway, if someone invites you to have a swig of swamp hooch, we really suggest you run away. Maybe punch them first, because clearly they’re trying to kill you, and that’ll give you a little more time to escape.

TRANSCRIPT

You’ve been listening to:

Tim Sherburn as Emily
Eric Perry as Howard
Kevin Hall as Greg
Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline
Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna
Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise
Richard Cowen as Leet, and
Richard Nadolny as your Narrator

Our music is by John Faley; our artwork is by Lucas Elliott. Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry.

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